Ways to annoy a Computer Repair Tech
People that know me find that I have a sense of humor that nearly has no bounds. I spent a few years providing computer support over the phone, so some of these resonate well with my experiences. So I present my top tips on how to annoy a computer repair tech!
1. Call everything a virus
Your computer not turning on? The monitor has weird lines across it? Your PC freezing all the time? Describe it as a virus!
2. Don’t turn on your computer before calling
Call your computer tech with an urgent problem but don’t have the computer turned on when you call. Sit in silence for the 2 minutes it takes for the computer to turn on. Your computer tech hasn’t waited enough in their life for computers to power up!
3. Don’t be in front of your computer when you call
Combined with number 2. this is a killer for the phone support guy. Call from downstairs and describe the problem, and then make them wait until you get upstairs before you can answer the first question!
4. Confuse right and left clicking
When the computer tech tells you to left click on something, right-click. Then tell the support person that “it didn’t work.” When asked to right-click do the opposite. This should confuse the tech guy. Keep it up until he starts reversing what he wants you to do to combat your confusion!
5. Never backup anything
Call computer support and tell them that your hard disk has crashed. Follow up by explaining that you have never stored any of your most important files in any form of backup! Listen carefully has the computer tech seethes in the background!
6. Don’t bring the power cord to your laptop
Need to drop off your laptop to the computer repairers? Don’t ever bring the power cord. We all know that every device uses the same power supply and plug combination.
7. Confuse the words “install” and “download”
Tell computer support that you downloaded a program, don’t say you installed a program. When you downloaded a program, use the word “install” to describe it.
8. Say “I don’t know anything about computers”
Start the conversation with low expectations. Tell the tech on the phone that you don’t think you can follow simple instructions. The tech has never dealt with people with less technical knowledge before have they?
9. Confuse the address bar with the search bar
When phone support tells you to type something into the address bar in your web browser, instead type it into Google.
10. Don’t check the power point when the computer won’t turn on
Call the computer tech and explain that your computer won’t power on. Demand immediate support and a replacement PC. Never ever check the power point first.